Greetings

Ufff... what a busy week it has been - OWN IDEAL has launched and work is in full swing.

The students make up your own ideal nutrition programs, learn to listen to their body and learn a lot of new things about themselves and completely debunk the myths about their omnivorousness and insatiability.

Readers send interesting ideas and share their successes and achievements in terms of body image, relationship with food and weight loss.

Changes are also coming in my personal life and this week I am one step closer to them.

In general, the week turned out to be very busy, fruitful, exciting and interesting.

I sincerely hope that this spring will be a real Spring for you too and you will feel blossoming and uplifting and inspired.

Today we’ll talk about this.

Another new name in the psychology of weight loss

Reference: Michelle May is a therapist, writer and consultant. She herself came out of the vicious circle of diets and practiced for 14 years in a psychological clinic in Phoenix, Arizona, USA. Then she completely switched to private practice and founded the training “Am I hungry? What to do when diets don't work?

This training once received the highest award from the American Academy of Family Physicians. In general, she is a prominent specialist and an important figure.

Based on this training “Am I hungry? What to do when diets don’t work” - she wrote the book

The book is quite voluminous - only half of the book is on psychology, the rest is quite reasonable recommendations on nutrition and physical activity.

The book is not bad... although not very deep.

But – I really liked one thing.

And it turned out really useful .

Although I have already written about this topic, today we’ll talk about it from a different angle.

Now I’ll share...

The most important thing in life

What do you think is the most important thing in life?

Sit down for a moment, lean back and ask yourself – what is most important to you in life?

Only honestly... Children, husband, family, career, money, freedom, creativity, beauty, health, sex, love, popularity...

What is most important to you?

And now - a verification of veracity.

Give yourself one day or half a day or at least an hour and observe yourself. Impartially.

So - as if you are another person who wants to know as much as possible about you :

• what worries you
• what do you think about most of the time
• what's going on in your head
• what's going on in your heart
• what's going on in your soul

And an answer like “confusion-confusion-horror-nightmare” does not suit this person - he needs specific data .

And here you are this person (in the role).

Today your task is to find out what do you devote your thoughts to, what do you do and what do you spend your energy on? .

Simply put, today your task is to look at what you devote your thoughts to.

In descending order.

This is what you will think about most of the time and what you will worry about the most and what will affect you the most during the day - that in fact this is the most important thing .

Honestly, this is often a very unpleasant test.

My clients REALLY don’t like him - but after him results improve immediately . (Especially after the second part of the test - about which some other time)

Because this test is called “face the truth” and overestimate a lot...

Now I will explain in more detail:

We become what we spend our thoughts, time and energy on.

... and this is what we get

Just look at life:

...you spend time taking care of the house and thinking about how to do it better - you become a wonderful housewife and you get a cozy Home (literally and figuratively)…

No one is born with all the knowledge and skills of a homemaker.

...you invest time and energy to master a certain specialty, work in it and constantly improve in it day after day - you become an excellent specialist and a Professional with a capital P and receive recognition and respect...

No one is born a great lawyer, doctor, pianist or race car driver - they become...

... you devote time and energy to reading, going to the theater, watching films - you become an educated and interesting person and get interesting leisure time and depth of perception...

No one is born erudite

That is, what we do day after day and what we devote ourselves to is what we become.

Three things are important here:

• constancy
• perseverance

• involvement

The Irony of Losing Weight

Now let's move on to the topic that worries us all - losing weight.

It doesn’t matter - in practice when they actually applied it or mentally - when they just read and tried to find something more or less sane and applicable.

The important thing is that you can already give advice on nutrition, calories and physical activity - you already know so much.

But still, losing weight is achieved with varying degrees of success.

Moreover, if your success in achieving weight can be very large and impressive. In terms of obsession with food, everything is exactly the opposite.

She is growing.

Why such injustice?

Just for this reason:

We become what we dedicate ourselves to..

You devote yourself, your thoughts, your energy, your strength to the fight against weight, the fight against yourself, food and temptations.

And you become... a fighter. A fighter for the figure, a fighter for weight, a fighter against harmfulness.

A wrestler does three main things in life:

• fights
• preparing for battle
• recovering and preparing for a new battle

Does this remind you of anything from your own life? Doesn’t it remind you of “new life from Monday”?

What's important here - a fighter is always a fighter .

Win, lose, draw - it doesn't matter in the end. After all, in his head there is always a fight going on, scenarios are always being played out, new strikes and hooks are being practiced, defense is being practiced.

This is his life.

This is his conscious choice. He consciously cultivates a fighter within himself - and becomes one. And it doesn’t matter whether it’s successful or not. He is a fighter.

He becomes one at all levels - at the level of thoughts, at the level of feelings and physically.

When you struggle with weight, you also cultivate a weight fighter within yourself..

Only you don't realize it.

Although you do this every day, many times a day - thinking about losing weight, weight, food, calories, looking judgmentally at yourself in the mirror, jumping on the scales - in the morning and not only in the morning, comparing yourself with others based on weight, etc. .

Day after day this leads to results.

The result - which you want to get rid of - fixation on food, constant thoughts about food and calories, constant thoughts about how not to eat anything extra, how not to gain weight, etc.

The situation is complicated by the fact that not only you yourself, but the entire modern society cultivates such a struggle and sets us up to turn into such fighters .

How a normal girl was turned into a food obsessive

When I was not yet 15 and I was in the 9th grade, although I had no hint of being overweight: 42-44 kg was my stable weight then - without diets, with pasta, potatoes, bread, cereals, vegetables and a completely nutritious diet with vegetables and fruits.

But they started preparing me.

To prepare for the fact that I will have to fight all my life to be thin. Otherwise, my belly and huge hips will grow.

Who started preparing me for such an unenviable fate?

My former neighbor who struggled with weight all her life and was obsessed with losing weight, my friend who was also obsessed with being thin, my godmother who herself suffered from being overweight... magazines and programs about how to lose weight and what is possible and what is not.

And in the end - everything became as predicted - literally in 2 years I began to weigh 15-17 kg more.

Great - isn't it?

I didn't have an ounce of excess weight, but I ALREADY started to struggle . And I achieved the complete opposite.

But I became a Fighter. Quite full-fledged - who just did in his head what he was doing was scrolling through a variety of ways to lose weight - even the most idiotic ones.

My whole life has become a struggle.

No matter what was happening around me, I brought it all down to food and excess weight. No matter what happened to me, I knew for sure that if I were thin, everything would be different.

The obsession with food grew.

And when I even later lost weight using my own methods of motivation and self-tuning, the problem of obsession was not solved.

Because I was still a Fighter - calories, fats and carbohydrates, grams of food and kilograms of my own weight were fighting in my head.

I lost weight - but was I happy?

No - because I didn’t have a relaxed attitude and a NORMAL attitude towards food.

Food caused fear, anxiety, apprehension, guilt, shame - especially when I was sweeping up everything in the food cabinets at a party.

Food became the world, losing weight became the meaning.

An endless process of struggle.

I became more and more a seasoned fighter - they even asked me about my secret on how to lose weight. But the more seasoned and experienced fighter I became, the stronger my obsession with food grew.

And this pain from the fact that I felt abnormal, unhealthy - it also ate me up.

So, what did you want to say?

That we make ourselves Fighters. Society helps us with this.

But this is a vicious circle.

Because a fighter either fights or prepares to fight.

He is never relaxed and his thoughts are devoted to battles.

So – and women with food.

And to get out of this circle, you need... just get out of it.

Breaking the obsession with food is the first step

First of all, keep track of where you direct your energy, what you spend your thoughts on and what you spend your time on.

That is, the first step is simply track.

Second step - do something about it b- redirect energy.
If you notice that you are again making an irresistible, attractive enemy out of food, counting calories and thinking about how not to lose your temper, if you notice that you are again growing and strengthening the weight-fighter within you, stop.

Tell yourself - I have something to spend energy on, I have something to spend my life on, I have something to spend time on in my life ... and start improving what is truly important to you but what you don’t get around to.

If this is health, then change your diet from a health standpoint, be sure to listen to your body, give it movement and rest and sleep and fresh air.

If this is a family, work on relationships, spend time with loved ones, do nice things for them, receive nice things from them, have heart-to-heart conversations

If this is the dream of your youth, take the first step, go to courses or take lessons, start a blog on this topic, share your knowledge with others - anything as long as it brings you closer to your dream and brings your dream to life

If you always wanted to sing - learn to sing and sing, if you wanted to dance - learn to dance, if you wanted to write a book - start.

We have as much time as we are given. And we are given only one life. And you need to live it for real, and not in your head or in front of the TV.

In English there is such a question - it is translated into Russian “What do you do in life?” If translated literally, it will sound like “what do you do with your time?”

So - our life is what we do with the time of our life.

And it depends only on you what you will spend it on. To unnecessary self-humiliation, struggle with food and yourself.

Or to make your life more joyful, fulfilling, brighter and more interesting.

The choice is yours.

By the way, this is exactly - the secret of the lucky ones who lost weight without dieting or obsessing over food .

They simply realized that there is a world beyond food. There are events and joys besides food. There is something that is more important than food - and we plunged headlong into it.

They stopped wasting energy on fighting. And directed energy towards LIFE . And energy stopped accumulating in their bodies. She began to spend money on LIFE.

And the weight went down automatically.

You can do this too.

Take your first step - start tracking where you spend your energy and thoughts and start redirecting them in a new direction .

Over time, this flow will become powerful, and the flow of food will be reduced to satisfying hunger and nothing more.

Just a little faith in yourself, a little awareness and a little persistence.

And everything will work out.

I believe in you

Sincerely,
Anastasia Dyachenko

Eating exceptionally high-quality products, going for regular morning jogs and evening walks is certainly commendable. But lately, the term “orthorexia” has been heard - an obsession with impeccable nutrition, excellent health and a healthy lifestyle.

Anatomy of orthorexia

Orthorexia is translated from Greek as “correct appetite.” For the first time they started talking about it as an excessive passion for healthy food. For example: eating exclusively sprouted wheat grains, avoiding foods with certain substances, and fried foods. Many people who have succumbed to the race for healthy food observe certain “rituals”: ​​chewing food 50 times or buying vegetables at the same time in a certain place. Orthorexics believe that by following these unwritten rules, they can cheat the passage of time and live to at least a hundred years. If they voluntarily or involuntarily deviate from the instructions (for example, they chew food not 50, but 49 times, or eat at 18:05, although they set the bar for themselves to have dinner no later than 18:00), this may become a reason for remorse. They can also impose their food rules on others, and are capable of ruining and even completely breaking off relationships with those who do not share their plate rules. However, such people, as a rule, are not limited to just quality food. Physical activity also becomes their thing - yoga, running, fitness. Moreover, here too the reasonable is replaced by the slogan “bigger, higher, stronger.” Such people are ready to run around the stadium or on their home treadmill to the point of exhaustion. Therefore, the word “orthorexia” is understood not just as a mania for proper nutrition, but as an obsession with a healthy lifestyle in general.

The path to longevity or neurosis?

American Stephen Bretman is considered the discoverer of orthorexia. He went through such an addiction, got rid of it and then wrote the book “Addiction to Healthy Foods: How to Overcome Your Obsession with Eating Healthy.” However, talking about orthorexia is a marketing ploy. In fact, in medicine, such “mental well-being” has been described for a long time and is called obsessive-compulsive disorder. A person can become obsessed with anything - buying injury tickets or counting pigeons in the park. In modern society, generally noble calls have appeared to look after your health, play sports, get rid of bad habits, and give up fast food. However, many people did not respond appropriately to these correct codes. This is where the mania for good food and a healthy lifestyle came from.

In fact, obsession is one of the forms of neurosis. Obsession with food further incapacitates already frayed nerves. Moreover, such people are not limited to following a diet and avoiding products with synthetic dyes and flavor enhancers. Without any medical grounds, they often remove truly valuable foods from their plates - eggs, butter, meat (they believe, for example, that these are sources of harmful protein and cholesterol). The body does not receive enough of the elements it needs, and this causes serious health problems. And sometimes fixation can become a sign of one of the mental disorders. Therefore, if orthorexia is clearly expressed, it is a good idea to consult a doctor.

Good day, Natalia. I have never participated in this kind of consultation, and I have never consulted a psychologist. But the moment has come when I understand that I cannot tell anyone about my problem, however, I absolutely need it.

The fact is that 2 years ago I began to get involved in proper nutrition and sports. Initially everything went fine. I have never had a big appetite, I ate in moderation, I didn’t focus too much on the dishes I ate (but I always remembered healthy foods, limited myself a little in sweets and various harmful foods, allowed myself them, but in moderation and extremely rarely). I only did fitness, which combined moderate strength training, dance, relaxation, and yoga. I was slim, even thinner than I should have been, but this did not cause concern, since I was always full of energy, healthy, proactive, and in no way looked like a person experiencing any problems.

But then, something stuck in my head. After the summer, which I spent without going on vacation, I started going to the gym, and before that I focused exclusively on protein foods. I tried to remove almost all carbohydrates, especially slow ones. I started eating cottage cheese, which I used to eat with honey, exclusively without it. And if before I felt at least some satisfaction from this meal, now it’s just an installation and nothing more. The workouts in the gym became harder. I work out with a trainer and today I have quite intense training with heavy weights for me. But they also became something they should take for granted.

I systematically began to break out on various foods once a week, I eat everything there is and I can’t stop. I don't feel full at regular meals. I'm obsessed with calories, the composition of the product, my diet is extremely stingy, I can't afford to relax and eat anything beyond my limits. The result is another breakdown, followed by dissatisfaction with oneself, guilt for what one has done, a desire to strain oneself physically in order to somehow burn all the calories, or a daytime hunger strike. Every time I scold myself, I try to pull myself together, but it’s all in vain. Now I don’t have enough strength for anything, all my thoughts are only about weight, food, etc., I have become less energetic, irritable, and aggressive. I understand that I’m already tired of myself and I don’t want it to continue like this. What is the way out of my situation? Thank you in advance. Even if I don’t get an answer, I’m already relieved that I spoke out.

Daria, 21 years old

Answer:

Good afternoon, Daria!

It is very good that you have mustered the strength to speak out. Discovering that you have a problem that needs to be solved is already one step towards a solution.

You ask what is the way out of your situation. You probably already realized that your eating disorders are the result of restrictions. The more you limit yourself, the higher the likelihood of relapse. Moreover, each individual failure is the result, the result of previous restrictions. Because your body requires different nutrients, both proteins and carbohydrates, including slow ones. From them you get energy. If you deliberately deprive your body of the substances it needs, you get the result: your body takes its toll at the cost of such breakdowns. Why this happened, I find it difficult to say. Most likely, at the moment when you began this obsession with protein foods, you somehow acquired the idea that protein foods need special control, and for some reason this is important. Then another idea was added to this idea - about limiting slow carbohydrates - but then it’s a matter of technique, as they say.

Think about what you know about controlling proteins and carbohydrates? Why should this be done? Where did you get this information from? Why do you believe in it?

Therefore, the most logical solution seems to be a gradual (precisely gradual and very slow, little by little) return to a normal, complete diet without limiting food groups and types. It may be difficult, then you will need the help of a psychologist. First, try to at least return to a normal, full breakfast, which would definitely include slow carbohydrates.

Intense physical training may also contribute to the development of an eating disorder. Usually, they are reinforced by some kind of beliefs like “If I don’t train intensely, I will completely lose control” or “Because I have breakdowns in eating, I gain a lot of calories during these moments. You need to get rid of them through intense training.”
I wish you success, Natalya

I’ll tell you about this using the example of a friend of mine. She is blonde, tall, of normal build, and very pretty. It's always incredibly interesting to be with her. But sometimes she stops in front of the mirror, takes a critical look at herself and says: “Oh, I’m getting so fat. Oh, I need to lose weight.”

In response to such self-flagellation, I sometimes utter a weighty: “And?” By this I mean something like this: “My dear, you know your worth. Have you gained a couple of “extra” pounds? It's OK. You feel great about your body and understand that you will soon lose weight again. These “extra” kilograms have never pushed anyone away from you. So why worry about this if you have an inner feeling of your own attractiveness and confirmation of this from other people?”

After twirling in front of the mirror, she goes about her business and quickly forgets about her “extra” pounds. There are more interesting things to do than self-flagellation.

In principle, if it weren’t for the imposed stereotype “beauty = thinness,” she wouldn’t even think about gaining some kilograms. She already sees herself as quite attractive. Men see her the same way.

Sometimes she loses a little weight. Not because she “needs” to lose weight, but because sometimes she doesn’t feel like eating and she doesn’t eat. Or there are so many events going on that it’s simply not possible to pay a lot of attention to food. Then a calmer period begins, and she can cook more again and gains a couple of kilograms. In addition, the female body is a cyclical thing, this must also be remembered. In summer there is a little more activity, in winter - a little less. How can I maintain the same weight?

She is a true intuitive eater. She knows how to enjoy life and seizes the moment “here and now”, and is in harmony with herself. This does not mean Buddhist peace 24/7. She has difficulties in life, like everyone else. She gets upset sometimes. Sometimes he gets very upset. She experiences stress, quarrels, makes peace, rejoices, suffers, has fun, and is sad. Allows himself to experience all sorts of emotions, good and bad. She just lives.

It would seem natural. But for some reason, not everyone manages to “just live.”
A person becomes so immersed in self-flagellation, so confused in his true feelings, that he has no time for life. I wish I could survive.

Survival is already a program that triggers certain physiological and psychological mechanisms. The body is busy trying to keep itself alive. And they explain to him about the “importance” of losing weight... What will the body choose?

How to learn to accept your body

To start living and stop surviving, you need to learn to accept yourself and your body now. It's not as scary as it might seem at first glance.

“Accepting yourself” does not mean that you can calm down and stop in your development. This means that at the moment you cannot completely change yourself and become who you want, but here and now you can find something good in yourself and focus on it. Stop dwelling on shortcomings and live in the future, in which the body will take the desired shape - there are also a lot of good things in the present moment. Let's look?

*First try to find at least one trait in yourself that you really like. Try to walk down the street with confidence once, without feeling guilty before someone. Give yourself permission to be beautiful in the moment, without putting it off until later when you achieve the desired shape. Beauty is not only appearance, but also inner state.

*Put the scales away, or better yet, throw them away. Learn to feel your body and understand how it reacts to events happening in life without the prompting of external “helpers” like scales. At first it may be difficult and unusual to live without such control, but it is much easier to establish contact with your body and listen to its needs.

*Observe people you know who you think are intuitive eaters. Look at how they feel about food. You don’t need to completely copy their behavior right away - it’s difficult to change your attitude towards food in a few days. Just watch them: what mood they are in when they eat, whether they take breaks while eating, whether they always have the same appetite. You may notice some connection between events in their lives and their relationship with food, and then it will be easier to understand your own eating behavior. For example, your intuitive eater friend may eat something sweet in a stressful situation, but he will stop exactly at the moment when he is full. What if you can stop like that?

*Arrange your personal space in the house(for example, a desk or chair with a coffee table). Let it be exactly the way you want it, and not someone else. Explain to your loved ones that this is your “corner”, that you have a right to it and that you desperately need personal space to recuperate.

*Try to imagine what life could be like without constantly talking and thinking about your wrong body. Stop discussing diets with your friends and surfing the Internet on fitness forums. Imagine what a trip to the store would be like if you were happy with your body. What will you focus on? On the sensations of the texture of things, on the color, on the combination of clothes? But you can enjoy the color and texture now. If at the moment there is no money to buy, then it’s okay - you can just try on clothes in the store. The purpose of such a trip is not so much to select a new wardrobe, but to search for something new and unusual: what if a dress that you have always avoided really suits you? This is a date with yourself, an opportunity to hear your inner voice - there is often not enough time for this. And when you have the means to buy the item you like, you can come back.

*Write down throughout the day what good things happened to you. Or in the evening before going to bed, remember the most memorable moments of the day. This is not necessarily something grandiose, let there be small bright events: at work we had especially good conversations with colleagues, the children brought good grades from school, there was an exciting and unexpected plot twist in your favorite TV series. Try to focus on such small joys. Perhaps you will very soon understand that such moments in life are always present.

And maybe one day it will turn out that there is more good in life, and your “shortcomings” are actually features. What makes you unique, unlike others, including girls from fashion magazines. You have your own life, your own tasks and your own values.

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Did you know that a fanatical desire to eat healthy can pose a threat to both physical and mental health? We asked Alexandra Menshikova, a psychologist and psychotherapist, to explain why an obsession with a healthy lifestyle has nothing to do with a healthy lifestyle.

Alexandra Menshikova // Photo: Ekaterina Frolova

Alexandra Menshikova, psychologist-psychotherapist, candidate of psychological sciences.

Orthorexia (from the Greek orthos - “straight, correct” and orexis - “urge to eat”) is usually called an excessive passion for “healthy” eating. But you won’t find such a disease either in or in Russia. There is not yet sufficient evidence that this habit negatively affects human health and can cause harm to him. There are also no clear criteria for what is considered orthorexia, and no understanding of exactly how this excessive passion affects the psyche. Nevertheless, the term itself, like the phenomenon itself, of course, exists. Quite often, orthorexia occurs among eating disorders, for example, as part of anorexia - in order to lose weight, a person switches to a “proper” diet and begins to exercise intensively. But there is still a fundamental difference between orthorexia and anorexia. With anorexia, it is important to a person how he looks and how much he weighs, so diets are just the result of the desire to bring the desired image to life, and with orthorexia, in principle, all attention is directed only to food. That is, the idea itself is important, the very fact of following the principles of “proper” nutrition.

Signs of orthorexia

Diet

In orthorexia, food quality plays a major role. Food must be natural, environmentally friendly and free of additives. Often people with orthorexia are convinced that a certain group of foods can harm them, so potentially harmful components are immediately excluded from the diet. That is, a person has a clear set of what can be eaten and what cannot be eaten (an example of “black and white thinking”, which is characterized by the labels “good”, “bad”, “harmful”, “useful”), and its main task is follow the rules of this system and in no case violate them.

Rituals

For a person obsessed with proper nutrition, eating is a real ritual. Food must be prepared in a certain way and under certain conditions (for example, in a pan with the “correct” coating), vegetables and fruits must be cut on a board made of environmentally friendly materials, and the act of eating must occur at a certain time - not when a person wants, and when need to. In other words, healthy eating turns into a religion, and everything connected with it - every little thing and every detail - begins to have almost decisive importance. And if, for example, such a person finds himself in a situation where he is forced to eat not what he planned, and not where he planned, he begins to experience severe stress. He develops fear, which often leads to him simply refusing to go to places where there is at least a minimal chance of eating the “wrong” food.

Avoidance behavior

Since a person very strictly monitors what he eats and what he absolutely cannot eat, he sometimes begins to avoid those places where “forbidden” foods could, in principle, appear. He also distances himself from those who do not share his opinion. It is important for him that his idea is supported, so he will try by all means to impose his beliefs on others. Often this behavior can lead to isolation and disruption of social ties. But nevertheless, such people quickly find like-minded people. Like-minded people with whom they are connected only by one common interest. And this interest is food.

A person with orthorexia does not eat to be healthy. The meaning of his life comes down to eating healthy food. That's all. So if you catch yourself that “proper” nutrition is becoming an obsession, and previous interests are fading into the background, it’s time to think about it.

Risk group

Orthorexia mainly affects young women under 35 years of age. Young men also face this problem, but less often. There are many reasons for the development of orthorexia - for example, if a person had a disease in childhood, requiring certain dietary behavior, or his parents are obsessed with healthy eating. But h Most likely to develop orthorexia are people with unstable self-esteem and unformed personal identity- they have not fully decided who they are, what they want, what they like and what is important to them. Their “I” is not formed, they do not know their interests, their needs, or their capabilities. Following certain food guidelines becomes a way of self-realization for them.

People with high demands on themselves are also at risk - they need strict rules to follow. Orthorexia can also be a reaction to stress - as a way to cope with it. In this case, the person does not solve the problem, but simply distracts himself from it for a while. He thinks that he has neutralized his worries and fears by shifting his focus to following the principles of proper nutrition, but in fact he has only formed a new fear. Fear of breaking your diet, relaxing and eating something wrong. Thus, stress only increases, and a feeling of guilt is added to the previous anxious states.

In any case, everything is relative and ambiguous. It is still quite difficult to draw a clear line where passion for proper nutrition turns into pathology. Still, it should be taken into account that a healthy lifestyle is a social trend. Society seems to say: if you follow it and at the same time you are slim and fit, then you are good, and if you are overweight and do not want to exercise, then you are lazy. That is, well done to those who eat right and exercise, but everyone else doesn’t. But actually it is not. Food, of course, is an important component of life, but not the main one. And it - by itself - will not make a person happy.

Even though people with orthorexia spend a lot of time thinking about food—their entire lives are filled with thoughts about food—they get absolutely no pleasure from eating. More precisely, this is how they get pleasure, but from the fact that they follow certain rules that they have set for themselves. Such a person feels chosen. He is great because he has willpower, and everyone else is weak. He begins to critically evaluate those around him and realize his superiority over them. An important note: he stands out not because of his deeds, but because of his food. That is, he has no other tools to express his “I”.